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[Ian Murphy] Volunteering at the Corwin Phone Bank
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Race
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| Contributor | RP |
| Last Edited | RP May 24, 2011 05:12pm |
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| Category | Blog Entry |
| Author | Ian Murphy |
| News Date | Tuesday, May 24, 2011 11:00:00 PM UTC0:0 |
| Description | It was like any other day after the apocalypse. “This is the Sabbath!” an older woman shouts in my ear. “It’s supposed to be a day of rest!”
“I know, ma’am,” I say. “But–
“But nothing!” she yells. “I can’t believe you people are calling me again!”
“But there’s a very important election coming up this Tuesday and if you don’t vote for Jane Corwin horrible things will happen to you and the people you love…she was a successful business fetus…hello?”
This was a fairly common exchange. I spent about three hours volunteering at Jane Corwin HQ, phoning potential voters, under the alias Steve Smith–an underemployed pet psychic and WNY repat most recently from Oakland, CA.
“Jesus!” a guy screams at me. “You know, I was thinking about voting for Corwin, but this is too much! You people have called me a dozen times in the last two days! I am sick of it!”
“But Jane Corwin wants to rule over you with an iron fist,” I calmly relay. “Don’t you crave strong leadership?”
“What?!” he balks. “An ‘iron fist’?”
“Yes,” I assure him. “These phone calls are just the beginning. When Jane’s in Congress she will do everything in her power to crush you mentally and physically.” |
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