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FLASHING FOR FREEDOM!
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Candidate
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| Contributor | Thomas Walker |
| Last Edited | Thomas Walker May 23, 2006 01:37pm |
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| Category | General |
| News Date | Tuesday, May 23, 2006 07:00:00 PM UTC0:0 |
| Description | Why I'm Stripping for Cash
It all started when political columnist Bob Ingram wrote the following about me (Loretta Nall), "Allow me to express a personal note of appreciation to Bob Martin, the editor of this newspaper, for finding a picture of gubernatorial candidate Loretta Nall to run with my column last week. I am sure it attracted a lot of readers."
"In 55 years of political writing, that was a first for me—-a picture in my column of a woman displaying cleavage. I can only hope that my mother...and I know for a fact where she ended in the after life...didn’t see that column. She wouldn’t have approved of that picture."
Well, I don't approve of political reporters who are titillated by my breasts while ignoring the serious issues which affect a whole lot of poor and disenfranchised Alabamians. I responded to Ingram with, "I'd like to extend the following invitation to both of you. Now that you and the rest of Alabama have been introduced to 'the twins' perhaps you'd like to meet the rest of me. I'll don my [burqa] so y'all won't be distracted and perhaps we can discuss the other planks in my platform, since Mr. Ingram saw fit to only discuss one."
In addition to my boobies , everyone knows about my underwear habits, but the media won't cover important issues like the thousands and thousands of people in state prisons serving time for victimless crimes. Unlike my competitors in this race, I'm fighting for equal rights and fair treatment for all Alabamians -- including homosexuals and hispanics. It seems they're trying to instigate a lynch mob mentality instead of applying a modicum of common sense to the issues.
They are trying to keep me off the ballot and I need to raise some fast cash to overcome the most egregious ballot access laws in the country. If you'll click your favorite of the three video animations you'll not only help me get on the ballot, but you'll likely end up getting a good chuckle out of it, too. Thanks! |
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